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Forget their taste anytime soon

The angel enters the other angel’s shrine bowing, its halo a faint autumn purple.

“Do you have a name?” it asks the other one sitting beside a window. “I mean, right now.”

“I don’t. I don’t need one right now. Do you?” the other one replies, not turning towards the door. Then it adds “You are welcome.”

“Thank you. As for the name, yes I do have one. I was asked to pass it on to you, after making sure you don’t have one already.”

“I had quite a few recently. None now,” nods the one still sitting. “Do speak it to me then.”

The one in the door moves in, crossing the small, bright room. It casts shadows, and there’s a loose feather trailing a circle slowly behind it in the air. It is a black feather, tinted purplish by the autumn halo. When the angel reaches the other one, it leans to it and whispers something in its left ear.

“No,” the sitting one says, not a shadow crossing its pure face. “I cannot bear that name now. I am too light for the task it implies.”

The raven-winged one reaches into a pouch of its robes. Its arm loses some of its colour.

“That is why I was told to bring you some of these.”

“What do you mean, these?”

“Pills. A new invention of internal affairs. It’s called a depressant, and it comes in pills. It helps taking on certain names. Its effects do wear off after a while, I’m told. I’m not yet sure it is true, however. Giving you the name has already helped a bit, but I’ll just have to see if I can forget their taste anytime soon.”
[perhaps not entirely what you'd expect it to be. :evillaugh: ]

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Featured by DLD (Daily Literature Deviations).
Thanks, guys.

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:iconthewrittenrevolution:
Having received a kind invitation recently I decided to give membership a try and joined The Written Revolution, a dA group whose icon you see above this paragraph. I wonder what they think of the 'humour' in this piece. ;)
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:iconthemaideninblack:
:iconthewrittenrevolution:

As I was the one to invite you, it's a pleasure to critique on this.

First off, I must admit that when I read that the angel's halo was purple I was sort of taken aback. It was unusual, but it made me think of a "sad angel", also because of the "autumn" word associated with it. And it seemed to fit with the angel itself, if it makes sense. :)

It also surprised me when the second angel says "You're welcome", before the one actually thanks. Not because usually you should wait for someone to thank you before saying it, but because I couldn't understand what the first angel should be thanking for...
However, after reading the entire prose, I started to think it probably thanks the other one because it can give the second angel the name... and so be freed from it. Have I guessed right? I'm curious.

Then, the ending really made me smile. In a sort of ironic and bitter way, but I smiled nonetheless. It was a very weird, intriguing prose to read.

My interpretation of it seems to tell me that the piece is about... "categories" in which we tend to put people. We pass to each other "names", which are nothing more than titles given by others to try and briefly describe us. Again, I am probably wrong. :noes: But I try, hehe.

As for the humour, I think that the one of the pills gave it away as a slightly ironic piece... by the way, that really was clever.

In conclusion, cunning and unusual prose. :clap:

=HtBlack
What do you think?
The Artist thought this was FAIR
3 out of 3 deviants thought this was fair.

The Artist has requested Critique on this Artwork

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:iconindigoskyes:
IndigoSkyes Featured By Owner Feb 7, 2010  Hobbyist Writer
Took me a couple reads to let it sink in. I really like it. A lot.
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:icongaborcsigas:
gaborcsigas Featured By Owner Feb 16, 2010  Professional Interface Designer
Thank you very much - I'm happy you found it that good. :nod:
Reply
:iconbibliolepticattack:
BibliolepticAttack Featured By Owner Jan 25, 2010
Funny! I love it. Thanks for the read. :)
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:icongaborcsigas:
gaborcsigas Featured By Owner Jan 25, 2010  Professional Interface Designer
thank you, I'm glad you liked it. :nod:
Reply
:iconliquoricesnaps:
LiquoriceSnaps Featured By Owner Jan 24, 2010
Oooooo I like the sinister ending. Well done :clap:
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:icongaborcsigas:
gaborcsigas Featured By Owner Jan 25, 2010  Professional Interface Designer
Thank you. I'm really happy you liked it. :thanks:
Reply
:iconb-j-oshea:
b-j-oshea Featured By Owner Jan 24, 2010  Hobbyist General Artist
That's very interesting ^^
Reply
:icongaborcsigas:
gaborcsigas Featured By Owner Jan 25, 2010  Professional Interface Designer
Thanks, I'm glad you think so. :nod:
Reply
:icondailylitdeviations:
DailyLitDeviations Featured By Owner Jan 24, 2010
Your wonderful literary work has been chosen to be featured by DLD (Daily Literature Deviations) in a news article that can be found here [link]
Be sure to check out the other artists featured and show your support by :+fav:ing the News Article.

Keep writing and keep creating.
Reply
:icongaborcsigas:
gaborcsigas Featured By Owner Jan 25, 2010  Professional Interface Designer
Thank you. I feel greatly honored to have been chosen and featured amongst such talented authors/poets.
Reply
:icondailylitdeviations:
DailyLitDeviations Featured By Owner Jan 25, 2010
It was our pleasure.
Reply
:iconexillior:
Exillior Featured By Owner May 1, 2009  Hobbyist General Artist
Lol! I love the imagery, it's very vivid and very revealing! I also really like the way the two characters use such plain and to-the-point sentences -- it's eloquent in a very masterful way!
Reply
:icongaborcsigas:
gaborcsigas Featured By Owner May 1, 2009  Professional Interface Designer
:) Thank you, I'm really glad you liked it! (And I'm especially happy about your fav - I guess that's the first 'favourite' I've ever been given for a literary piece here at dA. :D )
Reply
:iconexillior:
Exillior Featured By Owner May 1, 2009  Hobbyist General Artist
It is?! :wow: I'm shocked! My pieces are a lot randomer and a lot less polished, and I get lots of :+fav:s! (Well, not lots as in 100s, but you know what I mean...) I hadn't realised that you didn't have any faves on that! Can't believe it.

I wish I knew Hungarian, but according to my friend who's studying there, it's one of the hardest languages to learn, so I'm afraid I can't read the rest of your work ^^;
Reply
:icongaborcsigas:
gaborcsigas Featured By Owner May 2, 2009  Professional Interface Designer
I guess you're way more active socially than me - social networking is a great tool for us creative types to draw attention to our works, and you're doing it great: you "pull in" people and they appreciate your work. :thumbsup:

I know Hungarian is perceived as a hard to learn language - respect to your friend who's learning it as an adult. I wouldn't try it myself if it wasn't my native tongue. :D As for my works... maybe someday I'll get more pieces translated into English. :wishful: :)
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:iconexillior:
Exillior Featured By Owner May 2, 2009  Hobbyist General Artist
Well, usually when I upload, it gets a few views and faves straightaway because some people see it in 'newest'... So I haven't been really doing anything for these!

My friend has to learn Hungarian because she's studying in a Hungarian medical school, and to pass their exams they have to know Hungarian... I wish I could help with the translation -- I love translating and interpreting, but I can only do it for French/English ^^;
Reply
:icongothpunk:
gothpunk Featured By Owner May 4, 2007
:thumbsup:

Ez is jó darab!
Reply
:icongaborcsigas:
gaborcsigas Featured By Owner May 14, 2007  Professional Interface Designer
ezt is köszönöm. :nod:
Reply
:icontapsiful:
tapsiful Featured By Owner Apr 16, 2007
itt sem és továbbra sem rossz :)
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:icongaborcsigas:
gaborcsigas Featured By Owner Apr 28, 2007  Professional Interface Designer
én pedig itt is köszönöm továbbra is. :D

néha vannak ilyen szösszenetek, a legtöbbször csak fejben írom meg őket, de ha mégsem, akkor is eltűnnek általában egy jegyzetfüzet vagy egy folder mélyén, mindörökre... most pont egy post-ablakban kapott el az "ihlet", ezért került ez ki.
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:iconballaib:
ballaiB Featured By Owner Apr 15, 2007
szarkasztikus. :) és kifejezetten tetszetős!
ha szabad érdeklődni, honnan az ötlet?

-

DE miért nem magyarul?... (vagy legalább magyarul is...)

(ja, és szíves figyelmedbe ajánlom a Katatonia - Soil's Song (Krister Linder 2012 Remix) -ét!!! hihetetlen... :nod: )
Reply
:icongaborcsigas:
gaborcsigas Featured By Owner Apr 28, 2007  Professional Interface Designer
ja, és hogy miért nem magyarul? mert angolul jött az ötlet. :D komolyabbra fordítva: nemtom. komolyan. végső soron mindegy, nem? 23-an nézték meg. :sarcasticclap:
Reply
:iconballaib:
ballaiB Featured By Owner Apr 29, 2007
és ha 23-an nézték meg, akkor.. mi.. van? de komolyan.. az előzőekben esett szó a "produktívságról".. nem hiszem, hogy ha a devart-on megnéznek egy valamit 23-man, az rosszabb lenne, mintha megnézik 23.000-en, és favolják 500-an. ez nem műhely... :)

az angolság meg szerintem nem mindegy.. :)
Reply
:icongaborcsigas:
gaborcsigas Featured By Owner Apr 28, 2007  Professional Interface Designer
köszönöm!

az ötlet? nem tudom. csak úgy jött. ahogy az ötletek szoktak. derült égből. :)
Reply
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